The Purse-onalities of “The View”
I spent this past weekend reading purses at the Women’s Resource Fair in Lake Geneva. For two days, from 10 a.m. until 4 p.m., I examined purses from every angle and read close to 80 purses! Although a few stumped me, and a few purses just didn’t match the personality of the purse carrier, I was about 90% accurate in determining whether a woman was a Brassy, Sassy, Classy or Lassie purseonality.
Recently, Oprah got the cast of The View to empty their pocketbooks and although I didn’t get to personally read their purses, after watching the video, I am ready with my predictions.
Barbara Walter’s purse had lots of practical work-related items. I also overheard one of the other cast members say that her purse was very organized. Barbara responded, “Well, you know that I’m neat.” Since there is only one neat and organized purse carrier, my predication is that Barbara is a Classy.
Whoopie Goldberg shocked all of the women by professing that she doesn’t carry a purse. Only a Brassy would have the confidence to go through life without a purse.
Elisabeth Hasselbeck’s purse was bulging with stuff. Her purse had a little bling too. My prediction is Sassy, since Sasssy’s tend to be the messiest purse carriers and like some bling and shine on their purses.
Joy Behar’s purse looked to be a designer bag. She also seemed to have very few items inside her purse. This one stumped me because you would think she’d have a big flashy bag to go with her Sassy purseonality. I think it’s safe to say that she is a Brassy.
Sheri Shepherd had the other big messy bag and I was surprised that it wasn’t more of a flashy purse, because I believe that Sheri is a Sassy too.
So there you have it. No Lassies on The View, although I would say that Lassie is Elisabeth and Sheri’s secondary purseonality.
Click here to watch the Oprah.com video!
To learn what your Purse-onality is, check out my radio show on TheWinOnline.com!
I just wonder why Elizabeth Hasseldorf found it necessary to remove the deodorant from her bag before going onstage. (See “Season 25: Behind the Scenes,” OWN episode about guests from The View.)
1966 was the last time I dared ask a female to empty her purse. As a naive student teacher eager to inspire her students, I was convinced teens could learn to organize a paragraph the same way they organized the contents of their purses; gather things by function, or color, or size.
After Maria cooperated, my gender-equality seniors insisted “to be fair” we also needed to organize a boy’s wallet. (You probably see where this was headed.) The only thing in Melvin Sch***’s wallet was a pile of “balloons.” After 27 howling students with tears running down their cheeks raced to my desk for Kleenex, I, still confused, stumbled into the hallway where my less naïve elders lined up. (Class had barely ended. HOW DID THEY KNOW!!??) “So, we hear you had an interesting first day, Ms. Maertz.”
Then they educated me that most of 18 year old Melvin’s balloons had holes in them; he was already the father of two.
Signed, A No Longer Naïve Brassy